Good Day Nintendo, Episode 4: An Interview with the Star Fox Team

We interview the famous mercenary unit from Papetoon about their many exploits in saving the Lylat System!

Hello, Nintendo fans, enthusiasts and aficionados, and welcome to Good Day Nintendo, the show where we chat to the greats of Nintendo's past, present, future, parallel dimensions and fan-fiction-verses!

It's been a while, but we're back with an extra-special treat. They've saved the Lylat System time and again, to the point that there are no less than three distinct interpretations of the famous Lylat Wars! Where's Link when you need him, eh? (chuckles)

Without further fanfare, please welcome the Star Fox Mercenary Unit: Fox McCloud, Slippy Toad, Falco Lombardi and Peppy Hare!

(Claps and cheers)

WiiWareWave: Thank you for joining us today.

(The team stands still, their poses unchanging)

WiiWareWave: Uh... hello?

(The team continues to stand there)

WiiWareWave: Does anyone know...?

Camera dude: They aren't here.

WiiWareWave: Wait... are you kidding?

Camera dude: Do I LOOK like a nanny-goat to you?

WiiWareWave: Hilarious. Seriously, what the Fronk do you mean, "They aren't here"?!

Camera dude: I 'unno... they WERE scheduled to come on shortly before the show's hiatus.

WiiWareWave: True... but...

(The host gestures to the Star Fox team)

WiiWareWave: Then who are-

("Slippy" falls to the ground with a cardboard thud)

Camera dude: Stand-ins.

(The host quizzically raises an eyebrow)

WiiWareWave: Stand-ins...?

Camera dude: Yeah... we thought no-one would notice the difference.

WiiWareWave: You th-

(The host stifles a rant)

WiiWareWave: Most people have ways to tell the difference between a real person and a two-dimensional cardboard cutout of said person, y'know!

Camera dude: What about a two-dimensional cardboard cutout of Paper Mario?

WiiWareWave: Really...? THAT is the DU-

(The host pauses)

WiiWareWave: That's actually not a bad idea... note to self: (mumble, mumble)

Camera dude: So... what now?

WiiWareWave: Well, we CAN'T just interview a bunch of papercraft standees, can we? Ugh... this is the most awkward comeback we could have-

DA-DA DA-DAAAAAAA... DAA-DUN!

WiiWareWave: Oh, what now?!

Voice: Can't let you do that, Star Fox!

WiiWareWave: For the LOVE of-

(Wolf O'Donnell dashes onto the set)

Wolf: It's time to hijack this interv-

(Wolf looks around puzzled)

Wolf: Where the [CENSORED] is McCloud?!

WiiWareWave: (clears throat) Three guesses.

(Wolf stares as "Fox" falls to the ground with a cardboard thud, somehow flinging "Falco" into the air)

Wolf: Uh...?

WiiWareWave: I've been asking myself the same thing...

Wolf: So I stormed into this [CENSORED] set for a bunch of cardboard dummies that were made by a college dropout with only two chest hairs?!

Camera dude: Hey! ...my chest has seven hairs on it... with an eighth starting to sprout...

Wolf: Whatevs, I'm out. Later, losers!

(Wolf bursts through a wall and dashes away)

WiiWareWave: Uh... join us next time when we interview someone who actually shows up for filming.

Camera dude: You mean that rock chick's Dad from that one Pokémon game on DS?

WiiWareWave: Not helping, Gerry... anyway, see you then!

Big thanks to https://starfoxwiki.info/ for use of the image(s) in this feature!